Since I last posted here, we found out I was pregnant, and then, about thirteen weeks later, we lost the baby. While I was pregnant, I was very very sick. I mean, so sick that the smell of my own hair made me gag. My doctors ultimately gave me an anti-nausea medication which they also give to chemotherapy patients. This made it possible to eat without feeling like I wanted to cut my toes off, but didn't exactly bring back my energy and liveliness. So mostly, while I was briefly pregnant, I didn't do much besides sleep and feel ill, and stare sort of dumbfoundedly at the idea of my being a mother , of all things. We wanted the baby, had planned it, as much as one plans such things, and slowly, slowly, we picked names and I talked with my mother-in-law about what color to paint the nursery, and I bought a moon-shaped lamp from the thrift store. Somehow I was nervous we'd lose the pregnancy from the beginning, in the way I worry everything good will be taken from me, s
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By the way, regarding your post from a few weeks ago about girlfriends (it's been weeks since I've looked at people's blogs)...I have recently learned how important they are! For about the first year of marriage (and probably most of our dating and engagement time), I was just obsessed with Bryson, and didn't feel a need to have "girl time". And then, I realized I missed it desperately. There's just something about talking with a good girlfriend that you can't get from talking with a husband, or any other guy. So, I understand. I'm here for you if you want to chat, though I'll warn you that I'll whine about pregnancy things for at least part of the conversation! I'm hoping I find some girls I really get along with when we move to Texas...kind of scared about that.
I can commiserate with you lately. We have two dogs and a cat, so when they get along it is a miracle! And where girl friends are concerned--I feel totally helpless in that arena. I grew up with boys and have never had a relationship with a girl that didn't feel at least somewhat superficial. I blame myself for that, but realize it can be hard to find people you really connect with. I think it takes letting your guard down, being willing to share.
The funny thing is, even though I do most of the writing, most of the blog buddies are Michael's. Not to mention, he has a whole slew of relatives. He just updated it for me so some of my friends are on the list too now. I'm feeling a little more involved.